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The Regret Poem

Aroon sat up from the love nest of soft leaves. “Dugan, do you feel any regret over the changes we made?” He covered his shoulders with his hands, feeling a cold shiver shoot across his naked back.

“I do feel regret.” Dugan closed the distance to warm Aroon with his own body. “We should have known better than to make these changes.”

“Is it because we are men and are limited to what we can do?”

“No, it’s not that. Even as a man, I still love you.”

“I, too, still love you.” Aroon stood and walked away from Dugan. “But this love is not the same as before the change. It is different somehow.”

“It is not that simple.” Dugan stood and walked towards Aroon, stopping close enough to reach him. “The difference is in our bodies.”

“I feel that we made a terrible mistake, something we cannot change back.”

“I don’t think it was a mistake. We just made the wrong choice. We had the right to do so.”

“How did we fall in love? It is something unheard of,” Aroon whispered, “Never done before.” Tears trailed down from his blue eyes.

“We saw each other as reflections of a pool. It was inevitable.” Dugan closed in on Aroon.

“We met under strange circumstances.”

“We both met in the twilight centuries ago.”

“We make quite a pair under heaven and above the darkness.” Aroon looked at Dugan. “We are a mirror image of each other.”

“You came down from the heavens, and I up from the darkness.”

“I fell in love with your dark, leathery wings and your beastly, masculine body.”

“I love your white dove wings and your heavenly, angelic soul.” Dugan stretched his strong hands to caress Aroon’s face.

“I wanted your grotesque claws and long, scaled tail surrounding my body.”

“I desired more than anything to look at your blue eyes, your twinkled smile, hold your tender body and caress your soft skin.”

“I wanted to see you as a human being in the image of God.” Aroon caressed Dugan’s short black hair.

“I lusted for your frailty, as the Devil intended.” Dugan held Aroon’s hand, took it upon his lips, and kissed it.

“We decided to be together,” Aroon turned away, “for less than an eternity.”

“We made a decision to change for a new life.” Dugan turned around.

“We felt so much love and passion.”

“We felt more than passion. Something I cannot explain.”

Aroon lifted his hand to the heavens. “I had to hide from God to be with you.”

“I hid from the Devil.”

“Seeking your beastly body, I strayed through the nights,” Aroon walked away.

“Searching for your light, I endured the day,” Dugan followed.

“I was afraid of wanting to be with a demon.”

“I lusted for your body.” Dugan held Aroon’s hand.

“The earthly twilights we would wonder in lust.”

“Hiding from our creators, like Adam and Eve.”

“I came down from the heavens to be with you. The man I was afraid to love.”

“I came up from the darkness for love.” Dugan walked back to their love nest.

“I destroyed a poor man’s soul,” cried Aroon, “to be on earth with you?”

“I had to save a poor man’s soul from being here for you.” Dugan squeezed Aroon’s hand gently.

“Remember our first touch?”

“I almost killed us both with that touch. That is why we decided to make the change.”

“Our destiny is to be together like a poor man’s saved soul.”

“A sealed promise to be together.”

“I wanted to be with you, to finally be with you in the flesh.” Aroon looked up.

“And here I am with you in the flesh, and we do not want each other.”

“Now we can touch and feel like humans do.”

“Our bodies together.” Dugan held Aroon tight.

“Our mixed emotions are an experience we could not have otherwise.”

Aroon felt the wounds on Dugan’s back. “To feel the healing wounds of your lost wings.”

“To kiss your bruises and your scars from your long fall from the heavens,” Dugan kissed Aroon’s forehead.

“It is not the same. We have changed,” Aroon cried. “We didn’t know what to expect.”

“We have not faltered. We have only changed our bodies,” Dugan caressed Aroon’s wounds, “not knowing what to expect.”

“I still love you,” Aroon whispered.

“As do I. No matter what body we are in.”

“Is this the end to our quest?”

“Our quest is eternal.” Dugan smiled.

“Do we have any other choice for love?”

“We only have one choice.” Dugan sat down on their love nest.

“I hated humans, always protecting them from you.”

“I loved humans, happily damned them.”

“What was the love we felt for each other that we do not feel anymore?” Aroon sat next to Dugan.

“We feel the illusion of passionate love for each other in a beautiful earthly body.”

“You are now under the grace of God, and you may have a chance to go to heaven.”

“I may have the grace of God, but I choose not to go to heaven.”

“I am afraid of being in hell,” Aroon lay down, resting his head over his extended arm.

“You no longer have that grace, and you may be going to hell,” Dugan lay next to Aroon.

“It was a choice of wanting to touch you, your beautiful, red lips.”

“To feel the sweet, cool breath from your lips.”

“Making love to you has damned me. Loving you was worth my damnation.”

“You are what matters most in this damnation.”

“I have to repent, ask for forgiveness, and die to go to heaven once again,” cried Aroon in Dugan’s chest.

“I must destroy what matters most to die to return to hell once again.” Dugan picked up a heavy rock.

The Regret Poem
Gay Flash Fiction
August 4, 2012
Revised 05/27/22

Word Count 971

Published inPoetry